(inbox) probably too busy eating to pick up the phone

[bulletfool]

This is Kohei Izumi.
I'm not available right now, so please leave your name and message.

Comments

action;

[discard]

[Leon's really really stressed out.

Babysitting isn't something that comes naturally to him, so naturally...he's having a hard time. He stalks forward, grimly and certainly and doesn't quite realize that there's someone in the way until he turns the corner and

slams right into him

Naturally Leon's the one hitting the ground because Leon is the pint-sized one, farewell cruel world, farewell his dignity.]

[bulletfool]

[Izumi is 5'9" and already bending over to offer a hand, this poor kid. But for someone so small, that slam sure was hard.]

Ah, sorry! I didn't see you there. Are you okay?

[discard]

[Immediately, Leon is batting his hand away, naturally.]

Don't touch me.

[Ah yes, Leon's gonna Leon.]

I'm fine. [He shoves himself to his feet, dusting himself off prissily and scowling.]

Next time, watch where you are going.

[bulletfool]

[Whoa, son, no need to be so prickly.]

Ah – it's the same . . .

[The spitting sound of Kazama. Cerealia really has all types.]

We collided at this bend here, didn't we? It was an honest mistake, and nobody got hurt.

[discard]

...What are you talking about?

[??? Stop being so cryptic!!

Though he huffs a moment later.]

Do not be ridiculous. This entire situation could have been avoided if you had simply watched where you were going!

[forceofnature]

[Viridi barely waits for the beep.]

Hiiiii, it's me! Your favorite goddess. Probably the only goddess you know. ...Which still lands me squarely as the favorite. But I digress. I don't really know if this is the right person, but I left the same message on everyone else's machines just in case. Oh - and I told them to go ahead and forward it to you, so you might get a few repeats.

Anyway!

So we were talking about the salinization of the Fertile Crescent, which originally received its name due to the particularly nutrient-rich soil in the area. Your people arose from that region and with due time, spread throughout the rest of the earth, but not before they ruined their homeland forever, of course just like they ruined everything else.

Let's begin in the year 9000BCE, when the first farming settlements emerged out of the mud-slinging grunting ape people you all used to be back in the day. It sounds weird but I thi.k..ou.er.al...t..uter......en..........

..........5000 when irrigation was first dev..............

..........otamian Empire invaded the surround............

..........[10 minutes slowly pass]........

..........diot Alexander started this whole thing and.........

.........[how much time can this answering machine hold?]........

.........[maybe she'll need to use the bathroom...]..........

.........[wait here we go... it sounds like she's].........

And that's why the world is facing an unprecedented crisis in the deleterious effects of human-induced agricultural mishandling in regards to sustainable crop growth!

And another reason you suck.

OK!

I'll know if you don't listen to the very end of this, so don't you dare slack off! The next time we meet, you have to whisper the secret code word that shows you heard it all. It's, um. Ummm... 'Potato.' Yeah. That's good.

OK! Seeya! No need for thanks; this is a public service.

[bulletfool]

[Izumi wonders what possessed him to listen to this whole spiel. At the end of the message, he doesn't know if it was worth all the time it took for him to hear it out, but one thing's for sure – ]

. . . Potato?

[This is not public service. It's harassment!! There's no way he's calling back!]

voicemail

[onethousen]

Izumi-san? It's Chihiro. I was wondering, can you do that exploding thing in a specific area? Wait. Have you had any of the plants or the tree roots attack you recently?

[ these things have been hurting her friends and it's not like they listen. maybe explosions will help stem the tide. or drive off the fog. who knows!

then again she's calling a guy who manages some impressive explosions hoping maybe he'll have some insight into a way of handling the current chaos. ]

[bulletfool]

[ Izumi sounds entirely out of breath when he picks up the CereVice and calls Chihiro back. ]

Chihiro-chan, I got your message. [ He pauses here to suck in a deep breath. Laughing too much hurt his side. ] Did the plants get you?

[onethousen]

One tried to bite my face off and choke us to sleep and Nagasone-san cut it down and I had to run with his vessel because he asked. It was scary.

[ She probably didn't get around to telling him that tsukumogami "vessels" are their true bodies and that Nagasone is a tsukumogami and thus she was asked to run with someone's life in her hands that also happened to be a very sharp life and it was distressing??? ]

The roots have been easier to dodge in the fog. You can listen for them. All those flowers and the biting plants are sneakier. How about you? Are you okay?

[ his sucking in air finally registers as Important once her initial burst of "this HAPPENED" is over. ]

[bulletfool]

Whoa . . . That is scary.

[ Suddenly this doesn't seem as funny as it was earlier. Faceless Chihiro would be bad with a capital B – not to mention nightmare fuel for which nobody asked. ]

I'm fine. I just had a little laugh, thanks to the plants. But it's gotten really foggy, so I've been holing myself up indoors.

[ The building doesn't matter, as long as he has shelter. Running through the fog to go back to the flooded apartment unit seems like a stupid plan even by his standard. He saw the roots once, never again. ]

Where are you now? And what about the person who was with you?

[onethousen]

[ Now that his questions can actually be answered... ]

He's okay now. He came back to a body okay.

[ It was really gratifying and odd to see that flash of light and find Nagasone there again, in a different outlet, and not simply dying back in the plant-hill of doom. She shivers again, reacting to the memory.

That hill... ]

I'm between the apartment complexes and the school. I've been trying to avoid the bubbles.

voice;

[mombastic]

Hello? Kohei-kun? Are you holding up okay?

[ So it's not the day of killer tree roots, but it's not all that long after it, either. This poor guy, trying to settle in the colony, and everything goes all wonky... ]

[bulletfool]

[ The only things that haven't held up well to recent events are his shoes. ]

Yanagiya-san! It's good to hear from you.

I'm fine, but these past few days have been crazy!

[mombastic]

You're not wrong about that! I haven't had much of a chance to check on everyone, so I'm sorry this is so late...

[ Otome, you can't mom the whole colony. Stop. ]

[bulletfool]

[ But she can try. ]

No kidding? You must be busy if you're checking on everyone! Are you doing okay, too?

[onethousen]

[ Chihiro has been wrangling with the teleportation glitches she's been suffering, forcing them into a semblance of something she can control. TO degrees.

Enough so that she's mostly voluntarily controlling the direction of her teleportations. It's not enough to guarantee anything in a fast paced environment like the one that's happening with the Flamines' arrival, but it means when she snaps into existence near to Izumi, she's at least ready to move again. ]

Izumi-kun!

[ Not to mention holding out her hand as she spies whatever's heading their way. If he lets her take hold of his arm or takes her hand, she'll glitch teleport them up to the neighboring roof as one of the unmasked Flamines surges by and past. IF NOT THEN UH. SHE THROWS HERSELF AT HIM AND TRIES ANYWAY. AS YOU DO. ]

[bulletfool]

[ The cubes in the process of flickering into existence fizzle out with Chihiro's sudden arrival, the wide-eyed Izumi registering her presence. Somewhere in the chaotic train of thought about what he should be doing, he notices the proffered hand; unfortunately, he's not quick enough to accept it as he should. ]

Chihi –

[ HOWEVER, AS ONE DOES, he gets a faceful of one (1) Chihiro for the sake of timing and is summarily ejected to a nearby roof, where he stumbles to a stand with a gasp. ]

Whoa!

[onethousen]

[ She stumbles along with him, keeping her balance and twisting around to glance furtively behind them. Chihiro doesn't trust the reprieve or her own luck. The Flamines have left her alone, but the vine and leaf mask that sits on top of her head for lack of anywhere to properly carry it.

Heart pounding, she clenches her fists as she turns back his way. ]

How have you been?

[ ... granted, she's not sure how to find the words to express her concerns over people she knows and cares about, so Izumi gets whatever she blurted out first. Followed soon thereafter with: ]

I'm so glad you're okay.

[ Read: I'm glad you are not presently dead and dying. None of this explains her glitching manipulations, but that's neither here nor there on her priority scales. ]

[bulletfool]

[ And here he is with the ): mask tied around his shoulder, because Tachikawa didn't think to add big pockets to their trench coats. Why does his mask stink while Chihiro's gets a pretty cool design? ]

You're looking good, yourself. But what was that earlier?

[ They went from point A to B in the blink of an eye, and they're not even in ViViD. As someone who has yet to experience a glitch, Izumi is a little lost. ]

(frozen comment) THE PINES

[bulletfool]

All comments henceforth are a part of the Pines.

March 20th (or somewhere around there); the inbox takeover begins

[illustrious]

[The weather lately has been more than a little unfortunate. It's been nothing but thunder and rain and hail these days, and while Rohan takes little issue with things that give him an excuse not to go out and deal with people, he's tired of waiting for the weather to let up. While he thought his memory might still be fuzzy in some places (it was hard to tell—how were you supposed to know you'd forgotten something if you couldn't remember you'd known it in the first place?), but he'd remembered enough, and for this reason, he braves the storm to visit... his neighbor. The one who lives literally right next door.

Rohan makes his way to the front door of Izumi's house, and—

...you know, even in the rain, the grass is looking a little long, isn't it? Huh.

Well, either way, he's out there, umbrella in hand (though it doesn't do much to help), ringing the doorbell. Come on, Izumi, be a good neighbor, don't leave him hanging like this—]

everything i ever wanted

[bulletfool]

[The grass is, indeed, quite long.

Luckily for Rohan, Izumi tends to hang around in the warmth of his living room, because it's not like there's anyone with whom to share the large space, and that puts him fairly close to the front door. It's not an immediate response, but the door swings open soon enough.

Wow, that umbrella is no good.]

Mr. Rohan! What are you doing here?

[illustrious]

[Oh, good. If he had to look at that grass any longer, there might have been a problem—]

Hey, Izumi. [He sounds innocent, but is this really the face of a man you can trust...] I was hoping you might be able to help me with something. Can I come in?

[He doesn't think he's asking for much. Honestly, if the weather weren't so terrible, he wouldn't even ask to come inside. This shouldn't take long, though.]

[bulletfool]

[Izumi thinks that's the face of a man who can't take care of himself, and that is precisely why he steps aside to allow Rohan inside.]

Sure. What do you need help with?

[Not the lawn, hopefully. One favor for that is already one too many.]